Being Sindhi (3)

What a lovely day it is

A wedding in the family 

The wedding date that got fixed

A few months prior by Maharaj  Swami[i]

He is the family’s priest for all occassions

Be it a wedding, a naming ceremony 

Or even if it at the time of a death

He checks the Tippno (Almanac) in detail

Finds a date auspicious and shubh muhurat[ii]

Taking care that the wedding occurs in peace

avoiding to fix it in the month of their birth months

Traditional presentation of offerings

The bride and groom to be must then agree

The letters of invite are then sent out

Having finalized the date, venue and the plan

Unlike the olden days when the letters went by post

addressed to the elders several in generations 

no matter even if they were long ago dead

the nando[iii] and vado[iv] members of the family

got an individual mention in the invitation.

In today’s fast time and age, the same is done

through internet, by emails and whatsapp messages

The personal effect is albeit lost yet people understand

For they themselves unable to cope up take shortcuts

The bride who never used to have a say

in selecting the groom or even the articles for her dowry

Has changed with times, and become assertive

She rejected many and then opted for the One

Her partner in making wasn’t just for fun

She goes shopping together with her in laws

to buy her the things of her own choice

The dajho[v] to has undergone a transformation

From the fixed number of sarees[vi], sutharns[vii] and sandles

To unlimited items of the girl’s imagination

From the fixed ratio and sizes of diamonds 

such as patti jo churo[viii], vichhuaro[ix] and hasli[x] pendant

to a more adaptable, light weight multiple items

like bracelets, solitaires and the little trinkets

The groom too has plans of his wardrobe with adaptation

His choice of clothes though no more a mere fascination

Blends in well with his work life and not his parents imagination

The charm of not knowing each other’s likes and dislikes

no longer do they land up with such a situation

The attire for mehendi[xi], sagri[xii], dikh[xiii], vedi[xiv] all planned in unison

Not only the new couple but the families too blend in fusion

Gone are the days when we did a simple Buki[xv] Ceremony

It was a Thursday always prior to the vedi day

The vedi jo vago[xvi] and sandle or boot were of significance

The khurri[xvii] of footwear was tested for its strength

to avoid any on mandap[xviii] mishap or accident

The wheat was ground in a manner very symbolic

for the couple to be was taught to take on added responsibility

The feeding by the mother to the daughter or son

The jaggery and little sips of water in ceremony

Signifying the love that a mother folded in

yet giving away for her child to become independent

The sweetness must remain in relationships ever

The hugs with the mother saying you are separate nevery

Sitting under one scarf with the parents

The child to be married getting fond adulation

the Devta’s[xix] invoked at a make do prayer altar

Ritual conducted auspicious in their Holy presence

Believing the ancestral blessings too have come along

The relatives so fondly come to bless

applying the haidh[xx] freshly ground on the skin

and nourishing the scalp with oil filled hands

Unbeknownst to the person to be wed

their hands send vibrations of blessings and love

as they hold the currency note and do the ghora[xxi]

Over him or her and then place it as dakshina[xxii] to brahman[xxiii]

Sikiladi


[i] Maharaj Swami = (maha raaj, su aami)the revered priest

[ii] Shubh Muhurat = (shubh, moo hoo rut) the auspicious moment

[iii] Nando = (pronounced as – nun dough) younger one

[iv] Vado = (pronounced as – ve dough) elder one

[v] Dajho = (dha jho) trousseau

[vi] Saree =(saa ree) Indian female attire consisting of six yards of free flowing fabric

[vii] Sutharn =(su ttha urn)Loose trousers

[viii] Patti jo churo=(putti jo choo ro)diamond studded bangles that are a must in most sindhi weddings

[ix] Vichooanro = (Vi chhoo un ro)A traditional oblongish four sided diamond studded ring

[x] Hasli = (huss lee) A traditinal cresent moon shaped gold, silver or diamond pendant

[xi] Mehndi = (may hen thee) A wedding ritual where henna paste is applied to the bride and other women of the family

[xii] Sagri = (sug ree)A wedding ritual ceremony where the sister ties a string to the hair of the bridegroom once he is dressed for the wedding 

[xiii] Dikh = (dhi kha) A ritual When the bridegroom wears his wedding headgear and is greeted by all family members before he makes his move towards the Bride’s destination.

[xiv] Vedi = (vai dhi) The wedding ceremony

[xv] Buki = (boo key)A traditional ritual of grinding turmeric and other customs few days before the wedding at respective venues of the bride and bridegroom complimented with song and dance

[xvi] Vedi jo Vago +(Vai dhi, jo, va gho) Wedding gear

[xvii] Khurri =(khu rree) Heel of a shoe

[xviii] Mandap =(mun dup)The wedding alter

[xix] Devta =(daiv taa)Manifestation of God

[xx] Haidh=(hi ddh) Turmeric

[xxi] Ghora =(gho rr)money swirled away over a person and given away in alms as a blessing to the person

[xxii] Dakshina=(dakk shi naa)offerings

[xxiii] Brahmin=(brah min) learned scholar or priest

https://sikiladi.com

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