What a lovely day it is
A wedding in the family
The wedding date that got fixed
A few months prior by Maharaj Swami[i]
He is the family’s priest for all occassions
Be it a wedding, a naming ceremony
Or even if it at the time of a death
He checks the Tippno (Almanac) in detail
Finds a date auspicious and shubh muhurat[ii]
Taking care that the wedding occurs in peace
avoiding to fix it in the month of their birth months
The bride and groom to be must then agree
The letters of invite are then sent out
Having finalized the date, venue and the plan
Unlike the olden days when the letters went by post
addressed to the elders several in generations
no matter even if they were long ago dead
the nando[iii] and vado[iv] members of the family
got an individual mention in the invitation.
In today’s fast time and age, the same is done
through internet, by emails and whatsapp messages
The personal effect is albeit lost yet people understand
For they themselves unable to cope up take shortcuts
The bride who never used to have a say
in selecting the groom or even the articles for her dowry
Has changed with times, and become assertive
She rejected many and then opted for the One
Her partner in making wasn’t just for fun
She goes shopping together with her in laws
to buy her the things of her own choice
The dajho[v] to has undergone a transformation
From the fixed number of sarees[vi], sutharns[vii] and sandles
To unlimited items of the girl’s imagination
From the fixed ratio and sizes of diamonds
such as patti jo churo[viii], vichhuaro[ix] and hasli[x] pendant
to a more adaptable, light weight multiple items
like bracelets, solitaires and the little trinkets
The groom too has plans of his wardrobe with adaptation
His choice of clothes though no more a mere fascination
Blends in well with his work life and not his parents imagination
The charm of not knowing each other’s likes and dislikes
no longer do they land up with such a situation
The attire for mehendi[xi], sagri[xii], dikh[xiii], vedi[xiv] all planned in unison
Not only the new couple but the families too blend in fusion
Gone are the days when we did a simple Buki[xv] Ceremony
It was a Thursday always prior to the vedi day
The vedi jo vago[xvi] and sandle or boot were of significance
The khurri[xvii] of footwear was tested for its strength
to avoid any on mandap[xviii] mishap or accident
The wheat was ground in a manner very symbolic
for the couple to be was taught to take on added responsibility
The feeding by the mother to the daughter or son
The jaggery and little sips of water in ceremony
Signifying the love that a mother folded in
yet giving away for her child to become independent
The sweetness must remain in relationships ever
The hugs with the mother saying you are separate nevery
Sitting under one scarf with the parents
The child to be married getting fond adulation
the Devta’s[xix] invoked at a make do prayer altar
Ritual conducted auspicious in their Holy presence
Believing the ancestral blessings too have come along
The relatives so fondly come to bless
applying the haidh[xx] freshly ground on the skin
and nourishing the scalp with oil filled hands
Unbeknownst to the person to be wed
their hands send vibrations of blessings and love
as they hold the currency note and do the ghora[xxi]
Over him or her and then place it as dakshina[xxii] to brahman[xxiii]
Sikiladi
[i] Maharaj Swami = (maha raaj, su aami)the revered priest
[ii] Shubh Muhurat = (shubh, moo hoo rut) the auspicious moment
[iii] Nando = (pronounced as – nun dough) younger one
[iv] Vado = (pronounced as – ve dough) elder one
[v] Dajho = (dha jho) trousseau
[vi] Saree =(saa ree) Indian female attire consisting of six yards of free flowing fabric
[vii] Sutharn =(su ttha urn)Loose trousers
[viii] Patti jo churo=(putti jo choo ro)diamond studded bangles that are a must in most sindhi weddings
[ix] Vichooanro = (Vi chhoo un ro)A traditional oblongish four sided diamond studded ring
[x] Hasli = (huss lee) A traditinal cresent moon shaped gold, silver or diamond pendant
[xi] Mehndi = (may hen thee) A wedding ritual where henna paste is applied to the bride and other women of the family
[xii] Sagri = (sug ree)A wedding ritual ceremony where the sister ties a string to the hair of the bridegroom once he is dressed for the wedding
[xiii] Dikh = (dhi kha) A ritual When the bridegroom wears his wedding headgear and is greeted by all family members before he makes his move towards the Bride’s destination.
[xiv] Vedi = (vai dhi) The wedding ceremony
[xv] Buki = (boo key)A traditional ritual of grinding turmeric and other customs few days before the wedding at respective venues of the bride and bridegroom complimented with song and dance
[xvi] Vedi jo Vago +(Vai dhi, jo, va gho) Wedding gear
[xvii] Khurri =(khu rree) Heel of a shoe
[xviii] Mandap =(mun dup)The wedding alter
[xix] Devta =(daiv taa)Manifestation of God
[xx] Haidh=(hi ddh) Turmeric
[xxi] Ghora =(gho rr)money swirled away over a person and given away in alms as a blessing to the person
[xxii] Dakshina=(dakk shi naa)offerings
[xxiii] Brahmin=(brah min) learned scholar or priest
Sikiladi 